Typhoid Fever? No Thanks, I'll Take the Dengue!

Today, the whole family took the afternoon off to get our Typhoid immunization at a travel clinic in Rosslyn. The kids of course, have been getting shots their whole lives and hating it, but it's the only shot Rebecca and I need, unless we plan on exposing ourselves to Yellow Fever - which we don't. I've read that a shot to prevent Dengue Fever is also recommended for a visit to Ecuador, but we didn't get one. We really don't have any plans to travel to the jungle, as cool as that would be. Our loosely formulated plans are to hit the places that are doable in a weekend trip from Quito, maybe a week or so at the beach, and a trip to the Galapagos. As much as I'd like to swim with the piranha, it's not likely. So, no yellow fever and no dengue fever shots for any of us. I think only yellow fever is fatal anyway, so we'll just keep our fingers crossed that we get bit by a dengue mosquito and not the other. I can handle a bit of vomiting, achiness and bruising.

Rebecca told the kids a few weeks ago after their last visit to the pediatrician that they were done with shots until we got back. This made them happy. When Maya and Jonah were born, we did not follow the recommended vaccination program for various reasons that I'm not going to get into but which essentially boil down to we dislike the pharmaceutical companies and we didn't think a 2-day old needed to be immunized from Hep B - which is transmitted through blood or sex or something. Ask Rebecca. However, we do love our children, so we've been having them get the immunizations, but according to our own schedule. So, Rebecca has been taking them every month or so to get jabbed with this or that immunization. Then she takes them out for ice cream. As I said, the last time they went, Rebecca told them that was it for awhile.

Well, a few days ago she and I decided we needed to get a Typhoid shot because the immunizations are only good for two years. I had the shot in 2001 before we went somewhere. I can't even recall right now where. Rebecca had it in 1997 before she went to Guatemala. Typhoid can be picked up by ingesting dirty water. It is fairly likely we will come across dirty water. And I wouldn't be surprised if I found Jonah drinking it with a straw. The kid has no concept of cleanliness - he'll eat chewed gum that he finds in the cracks between the seats on the Metro. I just had to go answer the doorbell. It was the police looking for my neighbor. Anyway, so we went to get the shots today but didn't tell Maya and Jonah until we got to the waiting room. I asked Maya if she knew why we were there. She didn't. I told her and she started crying. She's like, Mommy said no more shots. She actually settled down pretty quickly because there was a LeapFrog globe in the waiting room that we started playing with and no matter where we put the pointer, it said "Guam." That was pretty funny.

When we got in the exam room, both her and Jonah started crying, even though Rebecca and I were getting the shots too. So much for misery loves company. But Maya was so brave that she volunteered to go first. She cried, but she did it. I went next. My last jab was probably my last Typhoid jab, so I didn't really remember what that was like. It hurt, but not for long. We had to really fight Jonah to get his pants down so the nurse could jab him. But I work out pretty regularly, so he didn't really have a chance. And Rebecca getting the shot was cool because she wore this shirt that she couldn't roll the sleeves up so she had to take her shirt off. That was a nice afternoon treat for me.

Then Rebecca and I decided to get our third Hep B shot which we had never gotten after we went to India in 1999 - I think there's a 6-month wait between the second and third shots and I can barely remember what you just said never mind what I am supposed to do in 6-months. So, she and I got that one. Maya and Jonah were fine with watching that one from the sidelines.

So, $500 later, we were off to get ice cream and then to the playground. It had been cold earlier in the day but the sun was out while we were at the playground and there were lots of kids there with their latin american nannies so it was good spring weather and the kids had a good time. I even got to practice my spanish with one of the nannies. I learned how to say "hug" - brazos.

The Immigrant Poem

Here is a poem that I wrote:

The Immigrant Poem

Picture a silhouette of a man on a hill in early morning
Darkness seeping out of the edges
He has traveled over days, his life always in another’s hands
And stands now on the cusp of what he hopes is more than opportunity
but a dream about to be realized.

Now picture a silhouette of a man on a hill at dusk
Darkness bleeding in from the corners and radiating from the center
His ancestors traveled over days, compelled by the thought of something better;
And this entitles him to stand there
Aiming to deny another man
his opportunity to realize a dream.

Our Going Away Party

Our going away party was actually on Saturday, April 19, but I’m only just recovered enough to write about it now. Rebecca and I estimated that there were 40 people at the party when it was in full swing. Understand that neither of us is worth a pile of pea gravel when it comes to math, but 40 people, give or take a few, is a lot of people to squeeze into a 1000 square foot townhouse. Fortunately, we had perfect weather so we were able to utilize our newly landscaped back yard, which is now trampled and in need of landscaping.

To the best of my recollection, the party was great. My folks attended from New Jersey, and split to my in-laws place at around 7 with Maya, Jonah and my nephew Gabriel. My sister Christine was there with her husband Paul and my sister Cathy was there with her husband Todd. My cousin Mike was there with his wife Maggie and their daughters Bella and Lillian. Everyone else, neighbors, old neighbors, old friends, new friends (i.e., those not blood-related to me) was probably there to see Rebecca. But that’s okay; I’ve gone to parties just to see Rebecca too.

Rebecca’s dad made some wicked Sangria. Rebecca, of course, prepared awesome food which had some semblance to a Latin American theme (I think we had salsa. But we also had pigs in a blanket. Hey, we intend to bring CULTURE to Ecuador). A few days after the party, Rebecca informed me that the food actually came out in stages, so that folks could spread their gastro-intestinal pleasure out over several courses, rather than wolfing down as much as possible in a half-hour and then letting the flies go to town. I neglected to eat, as I often do at parties, so my gastro-intestines missed out.

Lots of fun things happened at the party. My memories include not throwing up; giving Maya and her friends “reverse underdogs” on the swings at the Powhatan Park playground, which is behind our house; watching Jonah and my nephew Gabriel tear up my backyard while they played basketball with Jonah’s Little Tykes basketball hoop (this would have been gut-wrenching if not for the beer cooler close at hand); all the kids playing in the park and playground while the chaperones came and went, depending on their liquid needs; meeting our friend Kristen’s friend Alan and having them sleep in our bed (Not with us, Rebecca and I slept on a futon); having my first red bull and vodka, prepared by my sister Cathy (More, please!); and getting to hear my late night, dance mix playlist on the IPod, the playlist opens with a medley of Black Sabbath songs (Hand of Doom, Rat Salad, Jack the Stripper, Fairies Wear Boots. Though, come to think of it, I think Rebecca made me skip those songs). If anyone is reading this who attended the party and has memories, please add your memories by commenting to this post. This is one of my techniques to make my life richer; in a few years I’ll remember your memories as my memories.

But, the highlight for me was probably getting our neighbor Adam to agree to be the caretaker of our place while we are in Ecuador. One more item checked off the to-do list! I approached Adam with this task when he was buzzed enough to agree to anything, but not drunk enough so that he wouldn’t remember our conversation. Of course, in order to play the opportunity to my advantage, I had to maintain a level of sobriety myself, which I did. I thought I had actually done a better job of this because I went through the whole next day believing I hadn’t done anything embarrassing. But alas, when I sat down with my Mom and sister Christine on Sunday night, I was reminded of some things that I didn’t quite remember. The upside to the downside, though, is that none of those things involved me walking around with no pants.

How Did This Happen?

I was born on April 15, 1970 and spent most of the first 28 years of my life very happily in the 9 square miles that is Paramus, New Jersey. The furthest I ever wanted to travel was to the Bella Roma for a pizza. Then, the tsunami that is Rebecca Eichler kissed me, packed me onto a plane, and flew me to India. Still not satisfied, Rebecca tricked me onto the most temperamental of camels and marched me at least a dozen miles into the Thar Desert. There, I was tied to the ground among the dung beetles and the 35-degree (Celsius) heat, until I proposed marriage. Anything for a cold beer.

Having secured her “Don’t Hit on Me” travel insurance, Rebecca immediately booked a trip to Nepal, where carrying both my own and Rebecca’s backpack, I was mistaken for a donkey. After sorting things out with customs, I arrived back in the United States and was sent to work 8-hours a day, 5-days a week. "Ahhhh," I sighed. The life for me. Soon, however, I found myself on a plane to Hong Kong so that I could be fed ginger-flavored cat food and have uncooked eggs put in my pants. Of course, this led to Rebecca becoming pregnant, so she booked us a trip to Costa Rica which had to be cut short because I was actually enjoying myself. Our next trip, with child in tow, was to Baja California in the summer of 2004. This month long excursion proved mostly uneventful but for the birth of the hit family song “The Whoa-Whoas Poo-Pooed Everywhere”.

All Rebecca could muster after the second child arrived was a week-long trip to Puerto Rico at a place that, in a few years, might actually pass for a resort. At this point, I thought, she’s slowing down. I can settle into my preferred rut of drinking beer, watching baseball on TV, and occasionally, reading “Go Dog Go” to the children.

But then, the tsunami that is Rebecca came roaring back with her crowning achievement of upheaval to date - a 4-month trip to Quito, Ecuador, where they don’t even speak English! So, in order to be able to make intelligent conversation and perhaps find myself a senorita that just likes to stay at home and iron clothes, I embarked on the grueling task of intensive Spanish language training - reading books such as “Say Hola to the Circus” and “Hola means Hello, Adios means Goodbye”; looking at the Spanish newspaper headlines through the glass as I passed the newsbox on my way to work (sample headline – “Bush es un idiot!"); drinking Corona beer; and trying to put my daughter's bed together by using the Spanish instructions (she’s still sleeping with us). And, as our departure date (May 15) nears, I can honestly say, “Oh well, here we go . . .” .

Cuy Explained

Some of you reading this blog may not fully understand the significance of the title “Adventures of the Cuy," even though you may agree that it is a very witty and very catchy title. “Very catchy” is something that Maya likes to say when she hears a song she likes, as in, “That’s a very catchy song.”

The significance of “cuy” is two-fold.

First - “cuy” is the Spanish word for “guinea pig”. So, “Adventures of the Cuy” translates to “Adventures of the Guinea Pigs”. Now, you know that “guinea pig” is a term that is used when soliciting a volunteer to do something that you aren’t really sure how it is going to turn out, as in “Who’s going to be the guinea pig and jump off this bridge into the river to see if the river is deep enough for us to jump off this bridge without killing ourselves?” And then someone will volunteer to be the guinea pig and it’ll be alright.

In this case, the guinea pigs are me, Rebecca, Maya and Jonah. And the test run is to see how well we can get along in a country that is not Los Estados Unidos. Because if it works out, maybe we’ll want to try it again or try it in another country that is not Los Estados Unidos (like Thailand, where Asylum Access also has operations). If it works out, who knows what we’ll want to do.

Significance the second - “cuy” is considered a signature culinary dish in Ecuador – as in, “I’ll have the cuy, and a glass of water with a lime, please.” So, not only will we be guinea pigs, but we’ll be eating them as well.

Maya has guinea pigs in her Pre-K classroom and she knows that in Ecuador, folks eat guinea pigs. So, it’s a funny joke when she and I go into her classroom and look at the guinea pigs and say to them, “If we were in Ecuador, we’d eat you.” Maya and Jonah also like to go to the pet store and roll around on the floor. The other day we were at PetSmart and we stopped at the guinea pig cage and Maya looked at me, smiled, and said, “Don’t they look tasty?”

Getting ready to get started

So, a lot of you already know that we (me, Rebecca, Maya and Jonah) are headed to Quito, Ecuador soon and will be there for the next few months so Rebecca can pursue her lifelong dream of achieving legal status for Columbian refugees in this world. The day is approaching fast - May 15. Folks keep asking me what I'll be doing there while our bank accounts slowly work towards zero (Rebecca's working for free and I'm taking a leave of absence. If things get bad, Maya and Jonah can beg in the streets. Humility will be a good lesson for them.) For awhile, I was saying that I was going to be watching the kids. But, that sounds lame so I've begun telling them the truth. I'm going to be working on my Spanish and learning how to play harmonica.

When Rebecca came across this opportunity with Asylum Access last September 2007, it seemed like a good idea to go for it. Maya would be in her last summer before Kindergarten, I'd be about ready to shoot myself from having to go to work everyday for the last decade of my life, Jonah would be Jonah. And now that the date - May 15 - is near, it seems like an even better idea that we went for it. There were some things to work out - renting the house, letting my boss know that I wouldn't be around all summer, Rebecca had stuff to sort out at her own practice, Maya and schools - but it really seemed like everything just fell right into place. like this is what we were supposed to do. we posted the house for rent on craigslist and rented it in like a day. we went through some friends and got a place in Quito to rent that seems like it should work out perfectly. what else? I understand that beer is sold in Quito. So, really, you see what I mean that everything just fell into place? We even have electricity and running water!

My intent in keeping this blog, in addition to trying to bore you to death, is to record each and every detail of each and every day in a word for word account. ha ha. Not really. We'll see how it develops. Mostly, I guess, it's to keep you all posted on how things are going and to keep you involved in what we are doing. And to provide an account for ourselves, in my own words, so that we can hopefully sell it to a reality TV producer and make ourselves household names - like the Osbournes.

So, now that you know what I'll be doing here, you can decide never to check in again.

- captain cuy